Being Left Behind

Have you ever been left out of a get together that all of your other friends were going to? Probably everyone has unless you're the bee's knees (I've heard that phrase way too much lately). And obviously, it isn't a very pleasant experience. I remember whenever I was left out of something, I'd immediately try to have a get together with some of my other friends so that I could get over that lonely feeling as quickly as possible. However, while this may be the best solution for one's sanity and emotional stability, it may not be the right course of action.

This post is sort of a response to Henrik's and one of my other friends has come to me for counsel on this matter of being left out. I felt it last semester, actually. Many of you don't know this about me but I started drinking last summer. It was basically because a group of friends I made drank whenever they got together, so I felt odd not doing the same. And it was addicting. I had a lot of fun when I was intoxicated and I never really got into trouble (didn't drive or anything) so I felt like it all fun and games. It's startling that I had that mindset if you read one of my past xanga entries on how I would never drink. How weak I am.

In any case, this carried over into last semester for a short amount of time. I went out partying with Wes once, which I really regret because I instigated him to sin. And then the day after that, I went to yet another party on my own. That night, I was introduced to the consequences of drinking. I had too much and I threw up for the rest of the night. It was probably one of the most horrible experiences I've ever had in my life. The worst part was that I still didn't feel quite alright after I woke up the next day which is what really scared me. Ever since, I haven't had a drop of alcohol touch my lips, though I'd be lying if I didn't say I had the urge to go party sometimes.

I can pinpoint one exact moment, maybe a couple weeks after this incident when some of those friends (who introduced me to drinking) wanted to go out one night. It was sort of a last minute thing so I was scrounging around for details, hoping to get in on that action. To my dismay, none of them replied to me with info on what they were doing. Of course I felt crappy and left out. Yet I bet all of you can see that God was at work. What good could ever come from God hardening someone's heart (if you've ever had that question)? These friends were hardened against me, not inviting me to go party with them. Praise the Lord! I didn't go out drinking with them that night.

My point is that God continually works for our best. I know that all of you believe in that. So there's no point in being sad when the Lord Almighty is watching out for you.